A Friend or Foe?

How do you truly know if someone is your friend or not? There is a big difference between “acting” friendly and truly being a friend. Many believe that “children” do not really know the difference between “bullying” and ” friendship ”  but it is not only children , it is adults as well.

Someone who says kind words,acts nice,seems fun to be around and is funny as well does not mean that this person is a “friend” or a “trustworthy” one at that. Even if they do some nice things for you here and there.                                                       Every relationship is going to have their ups and downs. There are always going to misunderstandings. Also over time people grow, they change,and sometimes friendships end, that is life. Some friendships that meshed well during childhood,or your teens,do not mesh well later on in life. People have different goals, start pursuing other interests and friendships that worked ,well,they stop working.

Sometimes you are going to have to take a risks, and put in some work to get to know someone well enough to decide whether or not you want to keep this person as a friend.

To tell the difference between likeable and someone who you know is going to be an awesome friend , you have to judge by what that person does ALL of the time. Do not just judge by how they are with you, but how they are and act with others. If you have that gut feeling about someone or that something is wrong, go with it! Listen to your gut, it most likely will never lie to you. You need to keep certain questions in your mind at all times.

  1. Does this person do things that are important to both of you?
  2. Do they have your best interest at heart?Do they help you with certain problems?
  3. Do they encourage you to progress in all that you do? Are they encouraging,in a good way?
  4. Do they respect you and show respect no matter who is around?
  5. Do they tell the truth? Are they apologetic for things they have done wrong and try to fix or work at making things right? Do they try to stick to their commitments?
  6. Are they willing to work at problems?

If you have a yes to all of these questions than you have a GOOD friend, and a keeper. Remember this is not just friendships this is also relationships. Does your husband,wife,boyfriend,girlfriend,partner do all these? Just keep these questions is mind and you will have a good friend in the end . If the answer is no to even 2 of these than your friend is not really your friend now is he/she?


12 thoughts on “A Friend or Foe?

  1. Andy Oldham says:

    “How do you truly know if someone is your friend or not?” I love that first sentence! It is amazing that so many do not understand what a true friend is. I love too that you have given us some questions to discuss with our children and grandchildren. They are so important and open the door for discussion about friendship. Thanks!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Kirt D Tisdale says:

    Well stated! I love your reference to following your gut…I am a firm believer in that…too many people ignore their gut instincts.

    Constance…may you and your family have a very Merry Christmas and may 2015 bring nothing but Peace and Joy to you!!

    Liked by 1 person

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